The Pharisees’ question is odd. The Old Testament teaching was clear (see Deuteronomy 24:1–4). A man was permitted to divorce his wife, but, if she remarried and was divorced again, he could not marry her for a second time. This was to protect the woman from wife-swapping. Both could marry another person without the accusation of adultery. 

These can be hard verses to read if you have been through a divorce. It is important to note that Jesus is speaking with men who saw women as disposable. He is avoiding being dragged into a debate over particular reasons for divorce. He is not issuing pastoral guidance. Human experience testifies to the truth he is emphasising: God’s will is for marriage to be permanent, and when a marriage breaks down a clean separation is almost impossible. Part of one’s ‘flesh’ tends to remain stuck to the former spouse.

Maybe the Pharisees were trying to lure Jesus into making a controversial statement that could land him in trouble with Herod, like John the Baptist (6:14). Their approach to divorce centred on the question, ‘What can I get away with?’ For Jesus, the issue is not legislation on marriage, but the attitude of the heart (v 5), and this applies whether you are married, divorced or single. 

‘God of grace and God of glory, / on your people pour your power … Grant us wisdom, grant us courage / for the facing of this hour.’¹

It is not easy to write on this passage, but today I must unpack what Jesus said. In the Mosaic Law, a man could divorce his wife.² There was no provision for a woman to divorce her husband but, under Graeco-Roman law, women could. Why the Pharisees thought to trick Jesus with this question is unclear. Perhaps they thought that Jesus, known for his radical reinterpretations of Scripture, might fall into the trap of setting aside the Law. Jesus, of course, knew what they schemed and got them to quote the Law. Going back to the beginning of Scripture, Jesus showed that God’s ideal for marriage was a lifelong union between a man and a woman, so binding that to break the bond was to commit adultery. 

Jesus said divorce law was a necessary response to human sin, as indeed is all law. In a non-ideal world, people’s sins are an abuse of God-given free will and therefore always a departure from God’s ideal for our behaviour. However, society needs to manage the consequences of human sin. Jesus was not saying that a battered woman and her abused children must remain in a marriage, enduring psychological or physical violence to avoid divorce. He was saying that because of sin, in my example the sin of the husband, divorce must be allowed. It was far from God’s ideal, but sin made it necessary. There is a significant principle at play here. God’s ideals are not always achievable in a sinful and fallen world. I am part of this world and I know I certainly do not achieve God’s ideals. Modern law struggles to deal with this. We are all physically and spiritually damaged. Society must make decisions that are far from perfect, but take into account our fallenness, our inability now to attain God’s ideal.  

Jesus, Lord of our human relationships, forgive us that we cannot always achieve your ideal. Help us to make the best decisions we can in our fallen world. 

¹ Harry Emerson Fosdick, 1878 – 1969  ² Deut 24:1