Slices
Prepare
Review your recent conversations. How do they measure up to Colossians 4:6?
Bible passage
Vows
30 Moses said to the heads of the tribes of Israel: ‘This is what the Lord commands: 2 when a man makes a vow to the Lord or takes an oath to bind himself by a pledge, he must not break his word but must do everything he said.
3 ‘When a young woman still living in her father’s household makes a vow to the Lord or binds herself by a pledge 4 and her father hears about her vow or pledge but says nothing to her, then all her vows and every pledge by which she bound herself will stand. 5 But if her father forbids her when he hears about it, none of her vows or the pledges by which she bound herself will stand; the Lord will release her because her father has forbidden her.
6 ‘If she marries after she makes a vow or after her lips utter a rash promise by which she binds herself 7 and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her, then her vows or the pledges by which she bound herself will stand. 8 But if her husband forbids her when he hears about it, he nullifies the vow that binds her or the rash promise by which she binds herself, and the Lord will release her.
9 ‘Any vow or obligation taken by a widow or divorced woman will be binding on her.
10 ‘If a woman living with her husband makes a vow or binds herself by a pledge under oath 11 and her husband hears about it but says nothing to her and does not forbid her, then all her vows or the pledges by which she bound herself will stand. 12 But if her husband nullifies them when he hears about them, then none of the vows or pledges that came from her lips will stand. Her husband has nullified them, and the Lord will release her. 13 Her husband may confirm or nullify any vow she makes or any sworn pledge to deny herself. 14 But if her husband says nothing to her about it from day to day, then he confirms all her vows or the pledges binding on her. He confirms them by saying nothing to her when he hears about them. 15 If, however, he nullifies them some time after he hears about them, then he must bear the consequences of her wrongdoing.’
16 These are the regulations the Lord gave Moses concerning relationships between a man and his wife, and between a father and his young daughter still living at home.
Explore
Women reading this passage might be outraged. In the context of the religions of the Ancient Near East, the Old Testament treats women with remarkable honour and dignity. Even so, a woman’s role in the family was very different from most contemporary cultures.
In the Bible, vows are taken extremely seriously. ‘When you make a vow to God, do not delay to fulfil it … It is better not to make a vow than to make one and not fulfil it’ (Ecclesiastes 5:4,5). The Bible contains stories of men who make rash vows and have no one to get them out of the hole they have dug for themselves (eg Jephthah in Judges 11; King David in 1 Samuel 14). In today’s passage, a father or husband is able to release a woman from a vow which proves to be ‘rash’ (v 6).
Maybe you have, from time to time, made a rash commitment. In such circumstances we need humility to accept our mistake, and the wise and loving counsel of friends or family to help us find a way to be released without devaluing the currency of our words. I wonder whether we tend towards the opposite danger: our words are so careless that vows become meaningless.
Respond
‘All you need to say is simply “Yes,” or “No”; anything beyond this comes from the evil one’ (Matthew 5:37). ‘Lord, may my words always be trustworthy and true.’
Deeper Bible study
Let this be your prayer and pledge today: ‘You are my portion, Lord; I have promised to obey your words.’1
God’s people were obliged to keep his laws, but they were not obliged to make vows. A vow was a voluntary promise to do (or not do) something. However, its voluntary nature didn’t mean that a vow could be taken lightly or dismissed. Although a vow was not required by law, a person was required by law to honour any vow made (v 2). This principle applied to those who were free to act independently, without any constraints in fulfilling their vows: men (v 2) and widowed or divorced women (v 9).
Moses also deals with some exceptions to this general rule (vs 3–8,10–15), situations involving women who were under the authority of either their father or their husband (v 16). These additional provisions served as safeguards against a young girl’s ignorance or recklessness. They also helped to preserve domestic harmony, since they ensured that ‘neither wives nor children may substitute self-imposed religious obligations for God-given duties’.2 Jesus himself rebuked those who were using pledges as a pretext to evade responsibilities towards their parents.3 As in the matter of daughters inheriting, these provisions were just a starting point. The New Testament goes further. Paul emphasises the principle of mutual submission in relationships4 and specifically requires ‘mutual consent’ for any vow to abstain from marital relations.5
Today’s passage has three important takeaways. First, carefully count the cost before giving your word. Second, faithfully keep your word even when costly to do so. Third, in giving your word, be mindful that pledges involving your time, talents, resources, or affections affect more than just yourself and be considerate of others who are impacted by your commitments.
‘Does he [God] speak and then not act? Does he promise and not fulfil?’6 He does not! We can rely on God’s Word. But can he rely on ours?
1 Ps 119:57, The Message 2 Wenham, Numbers, 1981, p208 3 Matt 15:3–9 4 Eph 5:21 – 6:9 5 1 Cor 7:3–5 6 Num 23:19
Bible in a year
Read the Bible in a year: Ecclesiastes 1–3; 2 Thessalonians 2
Pray for Scripture Union
The SU Bake Off 2 holiday, along with others, is trying out some prototype resources for young leader development on the holidays and missions. Please pray for all our young leaders as they serve on the holidays and missions, that they may be encouraged and grow in their faith.
