Tam’s wife is a memorable character in Burns’ poem Tam o’ Shanter. What does she have in common with Absalom? Both ‘nursed’ their ‘wrath to keep it warm’.* Tam’s wife waits to give drunken Tam his due on his return. Absalom waits two years for the opportune moment to make Amnon pay for the rape of Tamar. His father David had done nothing. He would ensure justice was done. Shameful experience teaches us that justice for the sexually abused can be quietly ignored. But there are dangers in assuming we are to be the executors of judgement. Which is why Jesus issues his warning against arrogant judgementalism (Matthew 7:1). 

Like his half-brother Amnon, Absalom is a skilled schemer but with bigger ambitions. Motivations for exercising judgement on others are almost invariably mixed. For Absalom there was anger and ambition behind his action. He had one eye on the horrendous crime against Tamar, the other on the throne. 

Absalom’s haughty stance is apparent when he exhorts Amnon’s assassins by echoing words spoken to Joshua on entering the promised land (Joshua 1:6,7,9). Confusing our human ambition with God’s purpose and failing to recognise the seriousness of our sinfulness (‘if I am guilty’ (14:32) are a clear path to disaster.

*Robert Burns, 1759–1796.

‘Peace I leave … my peace I give … I do not give … as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.’¹

It doesn’t take much imagination to work out what happened next. Absalom, Tamar’s full brother, waited two years before he took his revenge, maybe waiting to see if David really would let Amnon get away with it. He probably saw Amnon’s murder as a legitimate exercise of justice. The similarity of his plan to that of Amnon and Jonadab is probably not coincidental. David suspected that Absalom’s invitation was not without ulterior motives, although his unwillingness to challenge his sons may have left him with the hope that Absalom had got over Tamar’s rape as easily as David himself seems to have done. In any case, David gave his blessing to Absalom’s party and indeed explicitly allowed Amnon to go, while staying out of the way himself. David was devastated when he thought Absalom had killed all his half-brothers but Amnon’s unpleasant co-conspirator Jonadab, presumably present at the feast, now sought to ingratiate himself with David by bringing reassurance. It was only Amnon that had been killed; and the implication of his comment about the rape is that Amnon deserved to die. Absalom avoided possible repercussions by fleeing to the protection of his (and Tamar’s) grandfather in nearby Geshur – apparently then an independent province in the Golan Heights. 

There are a lot of unanswered questions here. Was David expecting Absalom’s action? Was his mourning (v 37) for Amnon or for Absalom? What did Tamar think of all this? What does seem clear is that the writer wants to raise questions in his readers’ minds about David’s failures in parenting and to make it plain that this was a dysfunctional family. Absalom’s action is understandable, but whether it was right or wrong is left for readers to decide. 

What do you think Absalom should have done in this situation? What advice would you have given? How significant do you think it is that God is not mentioned in this chapter? 

¹ John 14:27