Slices
Prepare
Wedding planners abound. But have you ever wondered why we don’t also have ‘marriage planners’?
Bible passage
Listen! My beloved!
Look! Here he comes,
leaping across the mountains,
bounding over the hills.
9 My beloved is like a gazelle or a young stag.
Look! There he stands behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
peering through the lattice.
10 My beloved spoke and said to me,
‘Arise, my darling,
my beautiful one, come with me.
11 See! The winter is past;
the rains are over and gone.
12 Flowers appear on the earth;
the season of singing has come,
the cooing of doves
is heard in our land.
13 The fig-tree forms its early fruit;
the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.
Arise, come, my darling;
my beautiful one, come with me.’
He
14 My dove in the clefts of the rock,
in the hiding-places on the mountainside,
show me your face,
let me hear your voice;
for your voice is sweet,
and your face is lovely.
15 Catch for us the foxes,
the little foxes
that ruin the vineyards,
our vineyards that are in bloom.
She
16 My beloved is mine and I am his;
he browses among the lilies.
17 Until the day breaks
and the shadows flee,
turn, my beloved,
and be like a gazelle
or like a young stag
on the rugged hills.
3 All night long on my bed
I looked for the one my heart loves;
I looked for him but did not find him.
2 I will get up now and go about the city,
through its streets and squares;
I will search for the one my heart loves.
So I looked for him but did not find him.
3 The watchmen found me
as they made their rounds in the city.
‘Have you seen the one my heart loves?’
4 Scarcely had I passed them
when I found the one my heart loves.
I held him and would not let him go
till I had brought him to my mother’s house,
to the room of the one who conceived me.
5 Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you
by the gazelles and by the does of the field:
do not arouse or awaken love
until it so desires.
6 Who is this coming up from the wilderness
like a column of smoke,
perfumed with myrrh and incense
made from all the spices of the merchant?
7 Look! It is Solomon’s carriage,
escorted by sixty warriors,
the noblest of Israel,
8 all of them wearing the sword,
all experienced in battle,
each with his sword at his side,
prepared for the terrors of the night.
9 King Solomon made for himself the carriage;
he made it of wood from Lebanon.
10 Its posts he made of silver,
its base of gold.
Its seat was upholstered with purple,
its interior inlaid with love.
Daughters of Jerusalem, 11 come out,
and look, you daughters of Zion.
Look on King Solomon wearing a crown,
the crown with which his mother crowned him
on the day of his wedding,
the day his heart rejoiced.
Explore
Today’s passage culminates with a wedding (6–11). Solomon’s mighty warriors are present, along with the daughters of Jerusalem. Elaborate arrangements have been made. Clearly, much time, thought, resources and energy have been invested in ensuring that every detail is taken care of so that this ‘day his heart rejoiced’ (3:11) would be perfect!
Some couples prepare enthusiastically, even extravagantly, for their wedding day, yet fail to do the same for a lifetime of marriage. But this couple, in the lead-up to their wedding, also prepare diligently for marriage. Verbs like ‘listen’, ‘look’, ‘arise’, ‘come’, ‘show’, ‘catch’ and ‘turn’ (2:8,10,13,14,17) describe them being intentional about spending quality time together and daring to address difficulties. Coming out of our ‘hiding-places’ to show and share our true selves (v 14a) involves a risky level of truth-telling. Stripped of our masks, we stand ‘naked’ – and become vulnerable to ‘shame’ (Genesis 2:25). But as Timothy Keller says, ‘To be loved but not known is comforting but superficial. To be known and not loved is our greatest fear. But to be fully known and truly loved is, well, a lot like being loved by God.’*
Listening ears and an affirming heart (v 14) foster trust and transparency. Within this safe space, couples must also proactively ‘catch … the little foxes’ – those little problems – before they escalate and ruin their relationship (2:15).
*T Keller, The Meaning of Marriage, Hodder and Stoughton, 2011
Respond
How might your local church facilitate more meaningful marriage preparation for couples?
Bible in a year
Read the Bible in a year: Daniel 4,5; 1 John 5
Pray for Scripture Union
Praise God for SU Mission Enablers including Jenni Whymark and Revealing Jesus Pioneers including Eddie Howlett who provide such valuable support to Faith Guides working in a wide variety of contexts and with very different levels of mission experience. (This week's prayers relate to this article.)
