When Jesus stood amongst the weeping mourners at Lazarus’ grave, ‘a deep anger welled up within him’ (John 11:33, NLT). It was a severe response to the chaos caused by sin in God’s good creation. Sin shatters everything it touches, bringing sadness and confusion across generations. The death of a child intensifies our agony as we ask, ‘why?’

The deadly illness that strikes David and Uriah’s wife’s (a reminder of the adultery) son is heart-rending and raises numerous questions. It troubles us, making us contemplate the mysterious ways of God and the horrific impact of human behaviour on those who are blameless. In other places David teaches us how to lament when faced with such confusion (eg Psalm 13; 42; 43; 63; 64; 142). 

But here, David’s reaction is perplexing. Pleading with God is understandable but his sudden return to normal seems uncaring and is no way a model for our behaviour. No easy answers are provided. We note that we cannot dictate to others how long their mourning should last. Secondly, the thrust of this narrative is about looking forward. Amid disaster another son is born. The line continues and Solomon becomes the sign that God’s promise is intact. As believers in the King who has come in this royal line, we stand as the beneficiaries of this history.

‘For with you is the fountain of life; in your light we see light.’¹

Have you ever found yourself puzzled, or even shocked, by the behaviour or perspective of someone from another culture? I remember someone commenting on how rude people from a particular south Asian culture were because they didn’t say thank you when they were served in a shop. It was a revelation to me as a British person when I was told that constantly to thank someone for doing their job was seen as implying that you had expected them not to do it right. This passage raises the same kind of issues. David’s colleagues were as bewildered as modern readers by what was going on but for different reasons. They had no problem in grasping why the baby should die, but David’s pleading with God while the baby lived and yet apparently easily moving on when he died, was incomprehensible! The writer wants us to grasp David’s understanding of God’s character. 

David’s desperate prayer, followed by his calm acceptance, showed that he understood that God was living and active; he could and did respond to human prayer and was able (v 13) to show undeserved mercy. David also understood that God was free to act as he thought best. David’s prayer was not an attempt to blackmail God into doing what David wanted, but rather an honest expression of his own feelings, while also seeking out God’s will in this situation. Once the baby died, it was clear that no other way was possible, so prayer and fasting were no longer appropriate. Sometimes it is right to keep on praying² and sometimes it is right to accept the inevitable and move on.³ David understood that and, although there is nothing about his behaviour in chapter 11 to commend, here he does provide us with an example to follow. 

Lord God, help us to trust in your love and your sovereignty, even when our desperate praying seems to have been disregarded and we really don’t understand. 

¹ Ps 36:9  ² Luke 18:1–8  ³ 2 Cor 12:8–10